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The Mastery Program

Day 23

Flirting skill #3: The Good-bye Introduction; Handling Panic around Women

If you are shy, flirting with the "good-bye introduction" may be just the thing you need. Say you are somewhere where there is a woman you'd like to talk to, but you are just too scared. On your way out, you simply go up to the woman you want to flirt with, and say something like, "Hi, I have to go now, but before I did, I really wanted to let you know that you have a really great sense of style, and that I noticed it. I wish I had more time to spend with you, but I have to go. My name is David." Then leave. This allows you to build your confidence in approaching women, without having to take the risk of rejection--after all, you have to leave, you couldn't stay even if they wanted you to! (Some men also ask for phone numbers at this point.)

The goodbye introduction:
  • lets you be the kind of guy you want to be

  • limits risk

  • Shows romantic interest right away

  • Helps you spot details of a woman's presentation to compliment
Examples of the goodbye introduction:

First part: Chose one, or make up one of your own:

Hi, I'm just now leaving, but I just couldn't leave without coming up and telling you...

Hi, I'm just now leaving, but before I did I had to take the risk of looking like an idiot to tell you...

Second Part: chose one, or make up one of your own:

...You have such a beautiful smile, it just lights up the whole room,

...You have an incredible sense of style,

...You are incredibly beautiful,

...Your presence really lights up the whole room,

...You have such beautiful eyes, they seem to light up the whole room,

...You look like a really sweet person,

...You look really interesting.

Third part: chose one, or make up one of your own:

... I had to tell you that before I left. My name is...

... and I just couldn't let myself leave without telling you. Anyway, I gotta go, my name is...

...I wish I had time to stay and talk with you more, but I've gotta go. My name is...

...I wish I had time to stay and seduce you, but I've gotta go. By the way, my name is...

You could also end with:

...Before I leave, My name is X. I wonder if I could have your phone number or email address, and perhaps we could get together sometime? Here's my card.

How to Handle Panic around women

Pick one or more of these techniques to get you ready to go around women.
  1. Breathe-slowly into your abdomen

  2. Close eyes and consciously relax. Keep slowing down your breathing

  3. Picture a relaxing scene (examples), now put yourself into that scene

  4. Recall a time when you felt powerful and confident

  5. Stretch your body head to toe and keep breathing deeply as you do so

  6. Think about something else that is pleasant-food, sex, sports, etc.

  7. Don't take your thoughts seriously--just because you are having a thought doesn't mean you need to take it seriously.

  8. Picture someone you trust--like Ron Louis and David Copeland. Now imagine they are with you offering encouragement and support.

  9. Take a stroll and keep calming down. While walking think about someone you love, an experience that is pleasant, or something calming.
Other topics covered in day 23 of the CD program:
  • Using the goodbye introduction for the first time

  • Specific homework to put these new distinctions in action

  • How to practice the goodbye introduction

To find out how to get your program now, click here!

Mastery CD set